Day 3
Scripture Focus: When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long. Day and night your hand of discipline was heavy on me. My strength evaporated like water in the summer heat. Psalm 32: 3-4 NLT
Terry Kellogg calls sadness the "healing feeling".
When we feel sad, it is one way our body is acknowledging our powerlessness.
Sadness is how healthy people respond to loss.
One healthy way to feel sad is to say, "I feel sad."
It is honest, real, and deep. It strengthens community.
When my mother-in-law died a few months ago, people said the darnedest things. My favorite was, "I feel sad, too." It helped me experience community, connection, and caring.
I really didn't need anyone else to tell me how I was feeling, or should feel, or what I should think, or what the next right step should be for me as a daughter-in-law. I appreciated all attempts to connect. But a simple response- when it was truthful- of "I feel sad too" on the part of others whose experiences were the same as my own was most healing.
It is healthy to express, name, and take responsibility for our own emotions. It might be wise to not speculate on the emotional state of others. Certainly it is foolish to take responsibility for someone else's emotions.
It is healthy to have an awareness of how we impact others. But we cannot accept responsibility for managing the emotions of anyone but ourselves.
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