Having a Heart in a Sometimes Heartless World


Day 203 – Week 29 at a glance

Scripture focus: Remain in my love…I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. John 15:10-11

This week we discussed peace, panic, resting, joy and gratitude. I’m hoping that we remember that unhealthy folks only have a limited range of emotions – and even those few feelings are usually charged with negativity. Do you sit around during moments of resting and joy, waiting for the next shoe to drop? Do you distrust peace? Are you more comfortable with chaos than calm?

It’s crucial for big hearted people to seriously embrace all the many and varied feelings God planted within us. Think of it like this: in unhealthy families, they only get the basic crayon box – 8 crayons is all they have to color their emotions with. The eight pack box is for babies.

As we mature, we get to graduate to the 16 or 24 box. And if we’re really, really fortunate, we get the 64 set – with a sharpener on the back of the box! Remaining in the love of the Father expands our capacity to feel. It’s the equivalent of a 64 boxed set of Crayola crayons!

One summer when I was visiting my grandmother, she bought me a 64 boxed set of crayons – and several super cool coloring books. It was a great gift. I immediately ran next door to my best friend’s house – and we began coloring outside on her picnic table. I can still smell the honeysuckle that draped a nearby fence and feel the morning sun on my face. It was hot as heck, but with 64 colors to choose from – no one minded a little sweat. I colored with fuchsia and magenta, outlining the forms with a very fine-edged black – thanks to the cool sharpener. I learned that burnt umber was a legitimate shade (if it’s in the Crayola box – it’s legit) and midnight blue was stunning.

I only used that box one time. Called in for the afternoon, I left my beautiful box of crayons on the picnic table – and they melted into a pile of goo. Boy was I bummed! But in hindsight, this memory fills me with gratitude and my joy is complete. Because as valuable as the box of color was to me, what was priceless was the love of a grandmother who lets you come visit and always buys you a great treat. I mourned the loss of my coloring-potential, but to this day, I embrace the joy that comes with knowing that my grandparents loved me well.

At her house, it was possible to feel midnight blue and fuchsia pink – all in one day. No one coerced another’s emotional response (looking for something tidy and more appropriate) or tried to minimize pain. It was a sad day when the crayons melted, but that night we still ate ice cream and played flashlight tag until the grownups rounded us up for the evening.

I hope that this week encouraged us to embrace all the colors in our emotional rainbow – and listen for the joy, peace and gratitude that manages to show up – even on a midnight blue kind of day.

This completes the two hundred third day of our three hundred sixty five day journey. May your journey draw you nearer to God and closer to your true God-created identity.

Recommended reading: 2 Chronicles 3 and 4 in the morning; Romans 7 and Psalm 17 in the evening

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