Having a Heart in a Sometimes Heartless World


Day 229 - Measuring progress and avoiding the painful pursuit of perfection, Part 3

Scripture focus: It is obvious what kind of life develops out of trying to get your own way all the time:…frenzied and joyless grabs for happiness…Galatians 5:19 The Message

The next word is aselgeia – meaning excessive consumption, wild, undisciplined living that is especially marked by unbridled sex. It can also refer to excessive consumption of food. These definitions are found in Rick Renner’s book, Sparking Gems From the Greek, July 15th study. In Eugene Peterson’s translation, he’s broadened the application of this verse to extend beyond sex and food.

I got a call this week from a woman who was very upset with me. She wants me to tell you that Jesus saves – and I agree with her wholeheartedly on this point. She wants me to stop talking about our mental and emotional garbage. Just forget about it, she suggests. The past doesn’t matter. On this point, I must respectfully disagree. I disagree because in my own life experience, the gift of salvation was a crucial next step in my journey – not the destination. And if I had stopped with that step, I’m not sure how I would have handled her call. For example, I didn’t know the day after I was saved that this woman didn’t owe me kind treatment; I would have assumed that Christians didn’t speak unkindly to each other. Post salvation, I am continually learning about my own stinking accumulation of mental and emotional garbage and reckoning with my own frenzied and joyless grabs for happiness AND discovering what it means to step as God speaks. Through this process, I’ve discovered a lot about myself. This does not negate my salvation experience; my salvation experience gains me entry into the transformation process (Romans 12:1-3).

I have learned that although this woman doesn’t owe me kindness, I have a responsibility to treat her well (thus saith the Lord). This is counter-intuitive if the driving motivation of my life is personal happiness. Just because she lashes me with her tongue, doesn’t mean I’m free to return the favor. Knowing that Jesus desires for me to use this great gift of mercy and grace to step as he speaks has taught me something about the unforced rhythms of grace – and changed the way I dance with others too. I wasn’t given the gift of salvation to squander – or as a mode of transportation to the land of perpetual personal satisfaction and happiness.

With it came a decision on my part to turn control of my life over to him. So when scripture says – no more excessive consumption, wild and undisciplined living or frenzied and joyless grabs for happiness – I assume that means I need to make some changes. When scripture says, “love others,” I figure it’s my job to figure out what that means. It’s funny, really, the by-product of this stepping process. In the past, her vitriolic attack would have really stirred me up – causing me to feel shame and doubt and even a dose of self-condemnation (the result of believing falsely that others should treat me well, I should do well, and life should be easy). I’d have felt compelled to self-medicate. After I managed to disconnect from her phone bashing, something weird happened. I didn’t feel the need to smother my emotions with peanut butter or kick my dog – both options if I’m still living off the junk in my trunk. After years of trying to control my unhealthy responses (by using my own wits to try to stop myself from eating peanut butter and lashing out in anger), I’m discovering that when I do the next right thing, I don’t have the need to grab for something that I hope will make me happy (like a food fix or revenge).

This is a God thing. I’m still a real work in progress; but I’m celebrating one small miracle – yesterday, I didn’t yell back. I didn’t self-medicate. I did something different – and it not only felt good – it felt like the next right thing to do! Yippee!

Recommended reading: Nehemiah 11, 12 in the morning; Psalm 35 and 36 in the evening
Copyright 2008 Northstar Community

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