Having a Heart in a Sometimes Heartless World
Day 233 – Roadblock
Scripture focus: It is obvious what kind of life develops out of trying to get your own way all the time: …paranoid loneliness… Galatians 5:19 and 20 The Message
Echtra – Greek word that Peterson translates as “paranoid loneliness”, meaning intense hostility towards others; often used to refer to enemies in a military conflict; it could refer to a personal enemy or people who can’t get along with each other.
It is obvious that God created us for community. When we can’t get along with people, there’s no way we can experience the full and abundant life God intends for us. It simply can’t happen. John Donne said, “No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent.” And that’s true – especially if we’re in search of grand epic adventures and our true God-created identity.
When we don’t learn how to live well with others, it’s easier to blame them than accept responsibility for our own shortcomings. And face it, people give us plenty of reason to cast stones. People don’t treat us well. If we’re not paying attention, we’ll get obsessed with their bad treatment and miss our own bad behaving.
Soon, we’re in a vicious cycle of messy and unsatisfactory relationships. I love how Peterson chose the two words “paranoid loneliness” rather than the more obvious translation of “hatred” – because although hatred may be what this kind of lousy loving feels like, it doesn’t really capture the essence of the problem.
Lousy loving on anyone’s part can result in loneliness, and eventually paranoia. A few bad experiences are enough to drive us to islands of isolation. And although a fantasy of tropical island living may tickle our fancy, it’s highly unlikely that it is the location of our big dreams. (Although I’m perfectly willing to be convinced otherwise.)
So here’s what I suggest:
· Stop expecting others to treat us well – because that’s not the way life works.
· Learn appropriate responses to poor treatment – and respond accordingly.
· As we respond more appropriately to mistreatment, the incidences of mistreatment should dramatically drop – because we’ll stop hanging out with lousy lovers.
· It’s crucial that we focus our attention on treating others well. We must learn how to treat others with respect and dignity, kindness and grace. We don’t have time to be worrying ourselves with their misdeeds (except to use them as learning experiences).
· If we learn how to treat others well, people who also have this same ability will want to hang out with us. And we’ll end up with new and better friends than those lousy lovers we used to pal around with.
Even though we can’t expect others to treat us well all the time, we don’t have to end up paranoid and lonely. We can learn how to love well, and recognize others who do the same. May you find a community that brings out the best in you, as you do the same for others!
Recommended reading: Esther 8 and 9 in the morning; Esther 10 and 1 Corinthians 13 in the evening
Scripture focus: It is obvious what kind of life develops out of trying to get your own way all the time: …paranoid loneliness… Galatians 5:19 and 20 The Message
Echtra – Greek word that Peterson translates as “paranoid loneliness”, meaning intense hostility towards others; often used to refer to enemies in a military conflict; it could refer to a personal enemy or people who can’t get along with each other.
It is obvious that God created us for community. When we can’t get along with people, there’s no way we can experience the full and abundant life God intends for us. It simply can’t happen. John Donne said, “No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent.” And that’s true – especially if we’re in search of grand epic adventures and our true God-created identity.
When we don’t learn how to live well with others, it’s easier to blame them than accept responsibility for our own shortcomings. And face it, people give us plenty of reason to cast stones. People don’t treat us well. If we’re not paying attention, we’ll get obsessed with their bad treatment and miss our own bad behaving.
Soon, we’re in a vicious cycle of messy and unsatisfactory relationships. I love how Peterson chose the two words “paranoid loneliness” rather than the more obvious translation of “hatred” – because although hatred may be what this kind of lousy loving feels like, it doesn’t really capture the essence of the problem.
Lousy loving on anyone’s part can result in loneliness, and eventually paranoia. A few bad experiences are enough to drive us to islands of isolation. And although a fantasy of tropical island living may tickle our fancy, it’s highly unlikely that it is the location of our big dreams. (Although I’m perfectly willing to be convinced otherwise.)
So here’s what I suggest:
· Stop expecting others to treat us well – because that’s not the way life works.
· Learn appropriate responses to poor treatment – and respond accordingly.
· As we respond more appropriately to mistreatment, the incidences of mistreatment should dramatically drop – because we’ll stop hanging out with lousy lovers.
· It’s crucial that we focus our attention on treating others well. We must learn how to treat others with respect and dignity, kindness and grace. We don’t have time to be worrying ourselves with their misdeeds (except to use them as learning experiences).
· If we learn how to treat others well, people who also have this same ability will want to hang out with us. And we’ll end up with new and better friends than those lousy lovers we used to pal around with.
Even though we can’t expect others to treat us well all the time, we don’t have to end up paranoid and lonely. We can learn how to love well, and recognize others who do the same. May you find a community that brings out the best in you, as you do the same for others!
Recommended reading: Esther 8 and 9 in the morning; Esther 10 and 1 Corinthians 13 in the evening
Copyright 2008 Northstar Community
1 comment:
These devotionals are just wonderful. This one on Aug 20 was the first one I saw. When I first read about paranoid loneliness, I couldn't help thinking of a dear friend who has been diagnosed with PTSD. He has been a believer for over 10 years, I've known him for 4, and I have seen the Holy Spirit working in him a lot this year. He was even considering missions work. But he has setbacks with anger and gives up on himself. God put him in my life as a neighbor and we have been reading scripture and praying daily for about 5 months. Until a week ago. How does one help someone who gives up on himself when I clearly see how God has been working in his life? Is there a point where we give up on people and let them go do damage to themselves, or is there hope for healing for christians with PTSD? I am praying so. Are there any testimonies of that sort that you can direct me to?
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