September 1

Scripture focus: Don't be misled: No one makes a fool of God. What a person plants, he will harvest. The person who plants selfishness, ignoring the needs of others--ignoring God!--harvests a crop of weeds. All he'll have to show for his life is weeds! But the one who plants in response to God, letting God's Spirit do the growth work in him, harvests a crop of real life, eternal life. Galatians 6:7-8 (The Message)

One obvious boundary basic is the principle of sowing and reaping. We reap what we sow. Years ago I made the decision to plant wild flowers in my yard. That turned out to be a poor gardening decision. Those wild flowers look a lot prettier planted on a hill beside a busy highway than they do sprouting up around my azaleas. But here's the thing -- 18 years later, I'm still reaping what I sowed. We can't manage to keep grass, shrubs or roses alive, but those wild flowers keep popping up -- year after year after year.

Every few weeks I have to go pluck those offensive shoots out of my garden, but I do so without an ounce of regret. They provide a visual reminder that I will reap what I sow.

Boundary haters might say that this is unfair, or that God is punishing them when a mistake sown reaps a crop of consequences. That interpretation of events, however, does not jive with God's character. In Galatians, the writer isn't saying that God hangs from the heavenlies waiting to punish us for a mis-step.

This passage is actually showing us a boundary -- we reap what we sow. Our actions have consequences. This isn't a threat, it's a prediction. It's a warning. It's a reminder to each of us that we are responsible for our emotions, attitudes and actions. And we will harvest in keeping with our sowing.

This isn't a harsh God warning of dire retribution for bad behaving. This is our loving heavenly Father, gently reminding us through the words of the Apostle Paul -- be careful how you manage your life, because you will live with your management choices.

May we sow wisely today! In the meantime, I've got to go pluck some weeds out of my garden. I thank God that this serves as a small reminder to me that my choices matter. My actions have consequences.

Recommended reading: 1 Chronicles 25-29

August 31

Scripture focus: "A Samaritan traveling the road came on him. When he saw the man's condition, his heart went out to him. He gave him first aid, disinfecting and bandaging his wounds. Then he lifted him onto his donkey, led him to an inn, and made him comfortable. In the morning he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper, saying, 'Take good care of him. If it costs any more, put it on my bill—I'll pay you on my way back.'" Luke 10:33-35 (The Message)

Notice how beautifully the good Samaritan practiced healthy boundaries.

He followed Jesus' command to love and was responsible to rescue a man in need. But he did this without violating his healthy boundaries. He helped with the "burden" – that which the man was incapable of doing. He got him first aid and cleaned his wounds. He carried him and found him a comfortable spot for healing, and paid for enough care to get the man back on his feet.

But then he continued on, taking responsibility for himself. Presumably he carried on with his traveling. He didn't tarry in needless and over-responsible caretaking. He sacrificed by giving and caring, but he wasn't foolish.

The next morning, he picked up his "load" – those daily things that he was personally responsible for caring for – and off he went.

We often confuse our "to's" and "for's" but in the weeks ahead, we're going to have an opportunity to sharpen our serve by learning how to appropriately give and receive.

Then Jesus made a circuit of all the towns and villages. He taught in their meeting places, reported kingdom news, and healed their diseased bodies, healed their bruised and hurt lives. When he looked out over the crowds, his heart broke. So confused and aimless they were, like sheep with no shepherd. "What a huge harvest!" he said to his disciples. "How few workers! On your knees and pray for harvest hands!" Matthew 9:35-38 (The Message)

Recommended reading: 1 Chronicles 22-24

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August 30

Scripture focus: Appetite is an incentive to work; hunger makes you work all the harder. Proverbs 16:26 (The Message)

When we don't grow up with a healthy foundation and an appreciation for boundaries, we might miss a key life lesson.

There really are consequences for our actions. None of us are exempt from this law.

But if people have always leapt to our rescue, we may have missed this truth.

People who are inclined to interrupt others' life lessons are often labeled "codependent."

Don't be one of those guys!

Recommended reading: 1 Chronicles 19-21

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© Copyright 2009 NorthStar Community

August 29

Scripture focus: Don't you remember the rule we had when we lived with you? "If you don't work, you don't eat." And now we're getting reports that a bunch of lazy good-for-nothings are taking advantage of you. This must not be tolerated. We command them to get to work immediately—no excuses, no arguments—and earn their own keep. Friends, don't slack off in doing your duty. 2 Thessalonians 3:10-13 (The Message)

Today's scripture focus reminds me that boundaries help us learn how to live well in community. Healthy communities thrive when everyone pitches in and helps with the "burdens" – those problems so big that it takes a village to bear them and each individual carries their own "load" – the every day responsibilities that each individual can and should handle on their own.

Here are a few examples of intolerable boundary violations:

• When children are not allowed to express appropriate "no's," it is oftentimes because parents have withdrawn their love and support any time the child expresses a personal preference. This is blackmail, and often results in extremely compliant children who are also fearful, distrustful and unappreciative of their own healthy desire for autonomy. This withdrawal is often passive and hard to identify as a problem. The next example is a lot easier to spot.
• Angry words, punishment or inappropriate consequences meted out when a child expresses a boundary is evidence that parents are hostile towards boundaries. The only thing this teaches is how to avoid wrath. It doesn't help a kid learn how to delay gratification or trust their own instincts. Although this kind of anger may teach a child how to present a façade of "needless and wantless," it may also be creating an inward fermenting of anger, depression, substance abuse issues, etc. Watch out, these kids might just grow up to be as hostile and angry as their parental units!
• Not all parents are angry – some are super caring, even to the point of going out of their way to help a child avoid feeling the sting of consequences for mistakes and mis-steps. Although we might think we'd like people to always be jumping in front of potential encounters with suffering, this kind of super saving often leaves a kid adverse to risk-taking and too enmeshed with their human saviors.
• Of course, if there are parents who set way too many limits, there are also the ones who are limitless. Lack of boundaries is the opposite of hostility, and creates kids who may have difficulty hearing others' boundaries or recognizing others' needs.
• Inconsistent limits has its own set of problems, often leaving the child confused.
• Trauma also hurts; people who experience trauma may have their foundations so shaken that it's hard to build healthy boundaries.
• Some personalities are more teachable and responsive to boundaries than others. 
• Finally, when we and/or others live independently of God, the flourishing of sin in this shame-inflamed environment certainly contributes to boundary violations.

Recommended reading: 1 Chronicles 16-18

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© Copyright 2009 NorthStar Community

August 28

Scripture focus: When crowds of people came out for baptism because it was the popular thing to do, John exploded: "Brood of snakes! What do you think you're doing slithering down here to the river? Do you think a little water on your snakeskins is going to deflect God's judgment? It's your life that must change, not your skin. And don't think you can pull rank by claiming Abraham as 'father.' Being a child of Abraham is neither here nor there—children of Abraham are a dime a dozen. God can make children from stones if he wants. What counts is your life. Is it green and blossoming? Because if it's deadwood, it goes on the fire." Luke 3:7-9 (The Message)

Clearly, John had in mind what a green and blossoming life would look like, and the crowds that came out for baptism because it was the popular thing to do weren't among the blooming. If we're going to live a green and blossoming life, one of the prerequisites will be that we have a loving, supportive community to support us as we test out and approve what the abundant life is all about.

To acquire this life, certain stages of development must be mastered.

First, we bond. We learn that there is a me and then there are the other guys. Among the "others" are people who we bond with. These people help us learn that God intends for us to be loved so as not to feel isolated – even when we are alone.

Next, we distinguish between "me" and "not me." This is experienced as autonomy. It will set the stage for developing the ability to take responsibility for my feelings, attitudes and behaviors.

Once we learn of our own individuality, we start exploring our world to see what is out there that is "not me." This requires a lot of dependence on others. At this stage we like to explore, but only if we have a guide close at hand.

Eventually we become explorers in the fullest sense of the world. We begin practicing our independence. We learn how to take risks. If we are stifled and not allowed to explore, or we are allowed full expression without any limits, we will fail to appreciate and reach the next stage of development.

The next stage of development is when we realize that we are neither Super Man nor Wonder Woman. Our risk-taking ways, with appropriate bumps and bruises, will convince us that indeed, we need others. We have limits within ourselves. 

These developmental milestones help set in place a foundation upon which to build healthy boundaries. 

May we all learn how to "be rooted and established in love" Ephesians 3:17….

Recommended reading: 1 Chronicles 13-15

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© Copyright 2009 NorthStar Community

August 27

Scripture focus: A right time for...a right time to [repeat thirteen times]...see Ecclesiastes 3:2-8

Have you ever wondered if your boundaries are too thick? 

People who say "no" to good things may fall into that category.

It's a wonderful thing to serve others – but it is also a gift to accept help.

People who believe that their problems and legitimate wants are bad, harmful or shameful have developed an avoidant pattern of letting good into their lives. These folks often fail to have appropriate boundaries (can't say "no" to anyone) but too thick boundaries in other areas (can't say "yes" to an offer for help).

There is indeed a right time for giving and receiving.

If we're finding ourselves burned out, drained and tired of doing good, it may be because we've been doing more "good" than God intended and refusing the "good" He has offered for our replenishment. 

Healthy boundaries help us rest and recharge so that we can be strong and available when called upon to serve.

Recommended reading: 1 Chronicles10-12

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August 26

Scripture focus: I wrote you in my earlier letter that you shouldn't make yourselves at home among the sexually promiscuous. I didn't mean that you should have nothing at all to do with outsiders of that sort. Or with crooks, whether blue or white-collar. Or with spiritual phonies, for that matter. You'd have to leave the world entirely to do that! But I am saying that you shouldn't act as if everything is just fine when a friend who claims to be a Christian is promiscuous or crooked, is flip with God or rude to friends, gets drunk or becomes greedy and predatory. You can't just go along with this, treating it as acceptable behavior. I'm not responsible for what the outsiders do, but don't we have some responsibility for those within our community of believers? God decides on the outsiders, but we need to decide when our brothers and sisters are out of line and, if necessary, clean house. 1 Corinthians 5:9-13

In yesterday's devotional we learned about the fuzzy boundaries of compliant people. We discovered that the inability to say no to the bad often keeps us from recognizing evil. Today's scripture focus helps clarify the difference between recognizing evil and becoming a harsh, critical, judgmental person.

As God provides us with information about what it means to love him and others, we develop a repertoire of boundaries. I've learned that God cares about my sexual expression, he doesn't want me to steal, he wants me to tell the truth about myself, etc. He also tells me not to judge lest I be judged.

Without healthy boundaries, our desire to be spiritual and nonjudgmental might cause us to slip from one extreme to another – moving from judger to a one who has no judgment whatsoever.

There's a distinction made between being judgmental and using good judgment.

1 Corinthians reminds us that we are to choose wisely who we let into our "hut." We cannot ignore when someone claiming to be a believer acts in ways that are incongruent with that stated belief – especially when we discover that the person behaving this way is us!

Healthy boundaries demand that we clean house – making sure that our feelings, attitudes, and behaviors are congruent with one another. This will take up plenty of our time and energy, and probably won't leave us with the luxury of judging others.

Recommended reading: 1 Chronicles 7-9

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August 25

Scripture focus: A prudent person sees trouble coming and ducks; a simpleton walks in blindly and is clobbered. Proverbs 22:3 (The Message)

One of the responsibilities set before a parent is teaching a child how to say "no" to bad things. Unfortunately, some parents mess this up by requiring compliance at all costs from their children. Children need to learn how to say: No, I disagree, I don't want to, I'd prefer this not that, I choose this, I don't like that. When children aren't allowed to express preferences and feelings, they may become overly compliant – with fuzzy boundaries. In an effort to get along, they go along with whatever the crowd prefers. Here are some things that "compliants" fear: hurting other people's feelings, abandonment, separateness, another's anger, punishment, being shamed, or being viewed as bad or selfish or unspiritual.

A prudent person learns to recognize evil and avoid it.

May we all acquire the healthy boundaries necessary to protect self and others.

Recommended reading: 1 Chronicles 4-6

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© Copyright 2009 NorthStar Community

August 24

Scripture focus: You're blessed when you stay on course, walking steadily on the road revealed by God. You're blessed when you follow his directions, doing your best to find him. That's right—you don't go off on your own; you walk straight along the road he set. You, God, prescribed the right way to live; now you expect us to live it. Oh, that my steps might be steady, keeping to the course you set; then I'd never have any regrets in comparing my life with your counsel. I thank you for speaking straight from your heart; I learn the pattern of your righteous ways. I'm going to do what you tell me to do; don't ever walk off and leave me. Psalm 119:1-8 (The Message)

I am convinced that as we figure out who we are and what God created us for, we will find ourselves less inclined to swerve off course and partake of the destructive patterns that make up our own unique patterns of hurts, habits and hang-ups.

But each step has its own uncertainty. The psalmist understands that commitment to the path doesn't automatically result in follow-through. He realizes that following God's ways are a blessing, but apparently he is old enough to realize that good intentions don't guarantee a steady gait.

Even with full out commitment to stepping as God speaks, verse eight allows us to peak into the heart of this writer. Evidently, he trusts and he doubts. 

Don't ever walk off and leave me.

I find his cry oddly comforting. It helps me feel as if I am not a weirdo, or alone in my messy mind. I trust God and believe that staying on course brings blessings. I also realize that I unwittingly go off on my own sometimes, leaving the path set before me and ending up in a thicket. This really irritates me about myself.

The spiritual life isn't set in stone. Like a healthy boundary, it breathes. There are doors and windows, opportunities for input and course correction. 

It's okay to tell the truth about our believing...and the ways we both trust and doubt.

Recommended reading: 1 Chronicles 1-3

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© Copyright 2009 NorthStar Community

August 23

Scripture focus: Remember: A stingy planter gets a stingy crop; a lavish planter gets a lavish crop. I want each of you to take plenty of time to think it over, and make up your own mind what you will give. That will protect you against sob stories and arm-twisting. God loves it when the giver delights in the giving. 2 Corinthians 9:6-7 (The Message)

One of our local hospitals has a beautiful, large waiting area where family members sit while their loved ones are in surgery. When I go and sit with a friend or family member, I often end up meeting and sitting with strangers - not just people I know.

While waiting, we chat. During these experiences I learn a lot.

Recently, a stranger in our midst began talking about why she never went to church. "All church ever wants to do is count noses and nickels. Those preacher types don't care about anything but taking my money and putting my name on a membership roll so they can think they're doing a good job." Since she didn't know that I was a preacher type, she continued. "I think most of them get paid on commission. They probably get a percentage of the offering and maybe a small stipend per customer."

Truly, I tried hard not to chuckle. But it was such a great image! Finally, after the laughter died down, my friend turned and said, "I want to introduce you to my pastor." And the laughter began anew.

Maybe we're just disorganized, in fact, I know that is the truth! But in our NorthStar Communities we haven't devised a system for categorizing members, consistently counting noses or taking up offerings. Although I personally think all of us should be generous givers, I'm pretty sure that at NSC a person probably has to work pretty hard to give or get counted. 

Whether or not we worship in a church that has figured out how to count, or one that has not – here's one boundary we can rely on. God wants us to count the cost of our giving. He wants us to only give that which we are delighted to bestow. He trusts us to make up our own minds about how we manage all that he gives us.

Isn't it interesting that God is more interested in our feelings and attitudes about a particular behavior than he is about the amount of the gift? If God is respectful of our boundaries, doesn't it make sense that we should be respectful of boundaries too?

Recommended reading: 2 Kings 22-25

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August 22

Scripture focus: "If a fellow believer hurts you, go and tell him—work it out between the two of you. If he listens, you've made a friend. If he won't listen, take one or two others along so that the presence of witnesses will keep things honest, and try again. If he still won't listen, tell the church. If he won't listen to the church, you'll have to start over from scratch, confront him with the need for repentance, and offer again God's forgiving love. Take this most seriously: A yes on earth is yes in heaven; a no on earth is no in heaven. What you say to one another is eternal. I mean this. When two of you get together on anything at all on earth and make a prayer of it, my Father in heaven goes into action. And when two or three of you are together because of me, you can be sure that I'll be there." Matthew 18:15-20 (The Message)

I once believed that today's scripture focus was God's written permission to make sure that anyone and everyone who hurt my feelings got an earful from me. I assumed that the fellow believer was charged with listening to the offense and repenting of the harm they had done me! I liked that interpretation. When I began trying to put this principle into practice, I discovered that I was in need of some serious coaching. My interpretation didn't seem to ever lead to working things out. Instead, it seemed that it just caused more hurt feelings.

Here's where I went wrong. I failed to take into account the truth that expressing hurt must fall within the boundary of taking responsibility for my own feelings. It misses the point of the text to read this instruction and then go to your fellow believer loaded with ammunition. "You hurt my feelings when you..." isn't really the same as working out a relationship "ouchy" by accepting personal responsibility for my feelings.

Here's what I've discovered. I've learned that when I feel hurt, I often misbehave. So although this has proven to be a much more humbling experience, I now find myself applying Matthew 18 differently – I'm usually required to make an amends. "I felt...when...happened. That resulted in me doing..., which was totally inappropriate. I realize that I hurt you when I did that. How can I make restitution? I was wrong, and I'd like to ask your forgiveness." 

Usually this results in things getting worked out. Sometimes my offense is such that we have to bring in mediators to help us sort out the carnage. Once in awhile, the process of amending and reconciling results in my fellow believer having an insight about how maybe they, too, could have handled matters differently. But that's not really the goal – if it were, then my attempts at speaking and listening were really more about manipulation than making up.

The healthy boundary of expressing hurt feelings and working towards reconciliation is clearly a good idea. It's one way we accept responsibility for our feelings, attitudes and behaviors. But it isn't easy.

If you find yourself with a bundle of hurt feelings, perhaps it would be helpful to think about how your pain has resulted in you causing more pain. Just a thought. May we draw nearer to God and others as grow up in our salvation!

Recommended reading: 2 Kings 19-21

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© Copyright 2009 NorthStar Community

August 21

Scripture focus: And since you know that he cares, let your language show it. Don't add words like "I swear to God" to your own words. Don't show your impatience by concocting oaths to hurry up God. Just say yes or no. Just say what is true. That way, your language can't be used against you. James 5:12 (The Message)

Sometimes our feelings, attitudes and behavior reveal an astounding lack of trust in God. There are all sorts of perfectly good reasons why this is true. But I wonder – are they "good enough" to abandon trust in God?

When we are impatient, what does that tell us about what we believe about God's care and concern for us?

When we edit and rewrite our personal stories – for whatever reason – what are we saying about how we feel about trusting God with ourselves and others – even the messy parts?

Knowing that God cares is a healthy boundary.

It frees us from needless doubting and speculation about what he's up to and how we fit into his prevailing purposes.

I probably will never grow up enough to stop wondering about the 'whys' and 'why nots' – but I am old enough to realize that those questions, while natural and normal, aren't necessarily helpful and healing.

Just say what is true. That way, your language can't be used against you.

Recommended reading: 2 Kings 16-18

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August 20

Scripture focus: "And don't say anything you don't mean. This counsel is embedded deep in our traditions. You only make things worse when you lay down a smoke screen of pious talk, saying, 'I'll pray for you,' and never doing it, or saying, 'God be with you,' and not meaning it. You don't make your words true by embellishing them with religious lace. In making your speech sound more religious, it becomes less true. Just say 'yes' and 'no.' When you manipulate words to get your own way, you go wrong." Matthew 5:23-27 (The Message)

It's amazing how often scripture speaks about the power of words. Words play a super important role in setting boundaries. Boundaries separate and define each of us as unique individuals. They also help others understand and know the real us. Imagine a world where each of us was able to know the other in an honest way. Our feedback would be more on target. We could express appreciation for the strengths and gifts we see in each other, because nothing disingenuous would tarnish the view into the genuine, true God-created identity found in each of us.

Lacking confidence in the value of boundaries, sometimes we teach people things about us that turn out to be untrue. This can't be a good thing!

When Pete was a kid, he had a relative who regularly offered him a dessert that he didn't really like. But he loved his Aunt, and she seemed so thrilled that she had this treat for him that he just went along with the mistaken notion that he loved this particular food. No big deal, right? Every once in a while, he'd visit this family and be fed this dessert. He'd eat it; she'd be thrilled. End of story.

Even the smallest of boundary-less decisions can have a negative effect. Pete moved from Maine to Virginia, and this relative felt very sorry for him. After all, this kind of treat wasn't sold in Virginia. So when she came to visit, she did a very loving thing – she brought Pete a big supply of his "favorite" dessert. 

Pete had moved from indifference to distaste for this particular delicacy. But he was in a bind. How could he end this cycle of insanity? She took the trouble to buy, package and mail him this gift. He felt terrible. This went on and on until poor health ended her gift giving ways.

All this effort and eventual guilt could have been avoided with the careful use of a few tactful and honest words. Ultimately, this one little example of a word boundary violation resulted in Pete feeling "less known" rather than more. And he definitely felt like he had somehow become a less loving person by not being willing to tell this beloved relative the truth.

When people we love don't know our favorite foods or serve us ones we don't like unintentionally, that's no big deal. What is a big deal is when we find ourselves feeling unknown or uncared for as a result of word confusion. Ultimately, telling ourselves and others the truth will help all of us connect in ways that will be more fulfilling and enjoyable.

Recommended reading: 2 Kings 13-15

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August 19

Scripture focus: God spoke: "Let us make human beings in our image, make them reflecting our nature so they can be responsible for the fish in the sea, the birds in the air, the cattle, and, yes, Earth itself, and every animal that moves on the face of Earth." God created human beings; he created them godlike, reflecting God's nature. He created them male and female. God blessed them: "Prosper! Reproduce! Fill Earth! Take charge! Be responsible for fish in the sea and birds in the air, for every living thing that moves on the face of Earth." Genesis 1:26-28 (The Message)

One time a couple asked to meet with Pete and I to discuss their marital problems. Asking for input from another couple is an example of using a "people" boundary. When we invite others to hear our story and offer feedback, we're providing ourselves with a check and balance system. Feedback is good. Isolation is bad.

The husband opened the conversation by whipping out his bible and turning to today's scripture focus passage. He contended that their marital strife was a result of his wife's failure to understand and support his authoritative place in the world. From his perspective, God's call to "Prosper! Reproduce! Fill Earth! Take charge! Be responsible for fish in the sea and birds in the air…" meant that he was supposed to work hard and make a lot of money, make all decisions, and subdue the fish and birds by fishing and hunting every weekend. Of course, the reproducing part was up to the wife and he was willing to do his part on that front as well. 

One evening didn't renovate this marriage but it did begin a conversation. When we have really strong opinions about issues and those beliefs are causing us relationship problems, it might be a good idea to utilize a people boundary. 

Recommended reading: 2 Kings 10-12

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© Copyright 2009 NorthStar Community

August 18

Scripture focus: Father, I want those you gave me to be with me, right where I am, so they can see my glory, the splendor you gave me, having loved me long before there ever was a world. Righteous Father, the world has never known you, but I have known you, and these disciples know that you sent me on this mission. I have made your very being known to them— who you are and what you do— and continue to make it known, so that your love for me might be in them exactly as I am in them. John 17:24-26

We were absolutely created for intimate, loving relationships. Bad boundaries result in lousy loving.

Some lousy lovers include:

• Boundary victim – can't say "No!" – People who have trouble saying "no" to others aren't loving well in spite of their best intentions. An inability to draw healthy boundaries is not sacrificial love – it's usually more about people pleasing. I have a friend who continues to insist that pleasing others is a virtue. I, however, have discovered that when I care so much about what someone else thinks that my highest value is pleasing them, I'm caring more about their opinion of me than God's. It's an old fashioned term that still applies –it's called idolatry.
• Boundary hater – can't hear "No!" – Boundary victims and haters attract each other like magnets. A boundary hater pushes and pushes and pushes. If Jesus had been a boundary hater, he wouldn't have stood at the door and knocked. Although a boundary hater can be very aggressive, at least their behavior isn't confusing – unlike a manipulative boundary hater.
• Manipulative boundary hater – can't hear "No!" but hope we don't notice – Manipulative boundary haters are a lot trickier in their pushing boundary hating ways. These violators take a passive/aggressive approach. They are much more likely to use self-pity and indirect shaming to bust through boundaries. Their lack of aggression and self-effacing ways sometimes make it hard to recognize that they're as intent on ignoring your boundary as their more direct and pushy cohort, the boundary hater.

Boundary victims, haters and manipulators all miss the boat of loving like God.

My beloved friends, let us continue to love each other since love comes from God. Everyone who loves is born of God and experiences a relationship with God. The person who refuses to love doesn't know the first thing about God, because God is love—so you can't know him if you don't love. This is how God showed his love for us: God sent his only Son into the world so we might live through him. This is the kind of love we are talking about—not that we once upon a time loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to clear away our sins and the damage they've done to our relationship with God. 1 John 4:7-10 (The Message)

Recommended reading: 2 Kings 7-9

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August 17

Scripture focus: This is how we know we're living steadily and deeply in him, and he in us: He's given us life from his life, from his very own Spirit. Also, we've seen for ourselves and continue to state openly that the Father sent his Son as Savior of the world. Everyone who confesses that Jesus is God's Son participates continuously in an intimate relationship with God. We know it so well, we've embraced it heart and soul, this love that comes from God. 1 John 4:14-16 (The Message)

How do we learn how to live continuously in an intimate relationship with God? One thing we'll need to figure out is how to gain mastery of the following types of boundaries: skin, words, time, geography, emotional distance and other people.

Remember how boundaries function – they help us sort out what we are and are not responsible for, they keep the good in and the bad out, act as an alarm system, help us know when to withdraw and when to stay, they protect our freedom and our treasures – our feelings, our attitudes and our behaviors.

"Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes." Matthew 6:34 (The Message)

Matthew six provides us one example of a time boundary. In order to draw near to God and maintain conscious contact with him, it will require us to rearrange our sense of time. We spend so much time worrying about what did or might happen that sometimes we lose sight of what God is doing in and through and with us this very minute.

May you live on God Central Time today.

Recommended reading: 2 Kings 4-6

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© Copyright 2009 NorthStar Community

August 16

Scripture focus: I spelled out your character in detail to the men and women you gave me. They were yours in the first place; then you gave them to me, and they have now done what you said. They know now, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that everything you gave me is firsthand from you, for the message you gave me, I gave them; and they took it, and were convinced that I came from you. They believed that you sent me. John 17:6 and following (The Message)

Now God has us where he wants us, with all the time in this world and the next to shower grace and kindness upon us in Christ Jesus. Saving is all his idea, and all his work. All we do is trust him enough to let him do it. It's God's gift from start to finish! We don't play the major role. If we did, we'd probably go around bragging that we'd done the whole thing! No, we neither make nor save ourselves. God does both the making and saving. He creates each of us by Christ Jesus to join him in the work he does, the good work he has gotten ready for us to do, work we had better be doing. Ephesians 2:7-10 (The Message)
God has us right where he wants us, once we choose to believe.

Listen to his intentions for us:

• God wants to shower grace and kindness upon us.
• God wants to save us – it's completely his idea.
• God does the work of saving – we can't work hard enough to save ourselves.
• God does the heavy lifting, we do the trusting.
• All this is a gift from God.
• It's okay if we haven't worked out all our little quirks and hurts. We don't play a major role in any of this saving process.
• God does both the making and saving.

God creates us for good work – fulfilling, abundantly satisfying kingdom work.

What a deal! In fact, it's such awesomely good news that sometimes it seems almost too good to be true. Part of trusting God involves believing that what God says about us is more true than how we feel about ourselves or what others have said about us.

Recommended reading: 2 Kings 1-3

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