Day 287 – Week 42 – Father figures
Having a Heart in a Sometimes Heartless World
Having a Heart in a Sometimes Heartless World
Scripture focus: So Jesus explained, “I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself. He does only what he sees the Father doing. Whatever the Father does, the Son also does.” John 5:19 NLT
One of the most touching sections for me in Pausch’s book, The Last Lecture, were his references to his dad. “I won the parent lottery,” says Pausch. This guy loved his father – he thought he was smart and funny and cool and generous. Jesus felt the exact same way about his dad, too.
Living in a recovery community, I realize that not all of us have this kind of parent/child bond. Some people’s parents are foolish, mean-spirited and definitely uncool. In fact, some parents have only two temperatures – the cool disdain of indifference, or hot rage. Sometimes we can learn what NOT to do from our parental units! One note of warning: if this is how you’ve learned, be aware that “unlearning” and “relearning” requires a LOT of discipline, intentionality and new, improved models. When left to drift, we’ll always shift back toward our family system of origin. If you feel like you did not live the parent lottery – no worries. Simply stop counting on luck to direct your life!
Lesson eight: Listen to your parents – and learn from them. Learn from their positive influences, and make the decision to stop repeating multi-generational unhealthy patterns.
Another important point: we have more resources at our disposal than merely mortal. What other resources can a person use to rebound from a bad parenting situation? I’m so glad you asked!
It’s in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Ephesians 1:11 The Message
Jesus has explained to us that he gets all his info from his dad. He reminds us that he is an obedient son. He never deviates from the example of his father. We all need a role model to teach us about who we are, and what we are living for. If our parents haven’t been able – for whatever reason – to guide us, we have the model of Christ. We aren’t left abandoned, alone and without resources. We too can learn the unforced rhythms of grace and live by them. There’s more good news.
Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose he is working out in everything and everyone. Ephesians 1:12 The Message
If we have gotten too comfy excusing our own shortcomings by blaming our parental role models, now is a good time to adjust our attitudes! Follow Pausch’s example; learn how to listen, understand and follow the voice of the Good Shepherd. This will require reviewing lessons one through seven, and maybe require that we work the 12-steps. We might need to find a good therapist and work through some of our old issues. But whatever it takes – know that it can be accomplished!
May your spiritual pilgrimage lead you to your true, God-created identity. May you find out not only who you are but what you’re living for. May you find God’s glorious designs for your life. May you rejoice as you join God and embrace your part in fulfilling his overall purpose that he’s working out in everything and everyone.
Recommended reading: Jeremiah 24, 25 in the morning; 2 Thessalonians 2, Psalm 60 in the evening
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