Day 323 – Ridding ourselves of the perfection trap

Having a Heart in a Sometimes Heartless World


Scripture focus: What a God we have! And how fortunate we are to have him, this Father of our Master Jesus! Because Jesus was raised from the dead, we’ve been given a brand-new life and have everything to live for, including a future in heaven – and the future starts now! God is keeping careful watch over us and the future. The Day is coming when you’ll have it all – life healed and whole. I know how great this makes you feel, even though you have to put up with every kind of aggravation in the meantime. 1 Peter 1:3-6 The Message

In yesterday’s devotional, I talked about how my husband was able to have a healthy experience with food. Some days he over-eats, other days he gets distracted and under-eats. Most days he hits his calories in – exercise out numbers pretty effectively. He knows this is true because his weight doesn’t vary more than a few pounds, and no one yells at him when he gets on a scale. In fact, he doesn’t see his weight as a measure of his personhood. Amazingly enough, what he weighs doesn’t really define him. For those of us with a different life experience – it’s hard to relate to all this healthy thinking. But before we spike his food with poison, let’s pause to prepare.

Pete does not suffer from the “all or nothing” syndrome. He is able and willing to be a conscious participant in his life. He’s aware and able to acknowledge when he eats unhealthily. This aggravates him. But it doesn’t put him into a tailspin of further indulgence. Instead, he picks himself up, dusts himself off, and makes better choices – immediately.

Pete doesn’t feel the compulsion to be perfect.

Notice today’s focal passage. The writer is encouraging us to have a focus that is both present and future oriented. The expectation is that today may have some aggravations, but even those do not take us out of the running for a “healed and whole” life experience. We can have a satisfying life – without requiring perfection of ourselves or others! How cool is that?

I want to ask you a question. Do you think that it’s possible, just maybe, that our struggles with anxiety and all the “abnormal”, unconscious, sometimes crazy ways we cope with it – may have more to do with the burden of perfection than any “issue” we might have? In other words, could it be that a person with food, alcohol, drug, shopping, etc. “issues” might be attacking the wrong problem? Let me explain.

In our quest for “normal” are we really saying we want freedom from our compulsions? So we continue to attack those compulsions as if they are the problem for our unhealthy and decidedly unwhole lives? When instead, could it be, that they are merely symptoms of a life lived unsatisfactorily? An unsatisfying life is one lived without conscious awareness of both our frailty and our freedom. Our perfectionist ways leave us fragile – because no one is created to live under such pressure. Our freedom comes when we realize that God is capable of making us both healthy and whole. We must choose to cooperate with the process. But the satisfying life is not about eliminating all our hurts, habits and hang-ups. It’s about embracing the reality that God has given us a brand-new life. He’s keeping watch over us. We will have aggravations, but that doesn’t change the promise and potential God is working out in us. Satisfied people don’t lose sight of God in the midst of their sometimes aggravating lives. If that’s true, then what do we do with our compulsions? Ignore them? I don’t think so! More on this topic tomorrow.

Recommended reading: Ezekiel 40 and 41 in the morning; Psalm 95 and 96 in the evening


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