April 1

Step 4: We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

April 1

Scripture reading for today: Judges 6 and 2 Peter 1 - pay special attention to verses 3 – 11 in 2 Peter.

Today we turn our attention to step four – making a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. This step is going to require courage. Thankfully, God did not give his children a spirit of timidity, but of power, love and sound mind. We’re going to need His power, His love and the mind of Christ to take this next step.

I find that self-objectivity is a difficult task. It feels burdensome at times. But learning how to see myself accurately enables me to understand how others see me. Why should that matter? Isn’t other people’s opinion of me their deal, not mine? Well….not exactly.
From the beginning of time, God has had us in His mind, and He created us as relational beings. We weren’t meant to live in isolation. In fact, when Jesus was asked to name the most important commandment, He couldn’t do it. He names two: love God and love others (as you love yourself). Isn’t that fascinating? He didn’t command them to achieve world peace, end poverty or fight for the rights of the underprivileged. That’s not what He said. He said – love God, love others, love self. We love in the context of community. It’s all about relationships.
So it does matter how other people “see us”. How we relate to others, and others relate to us, will be a key ingredient in our ability to follow those two commandments that Jesus couldn’t separate.

Once I was walking out of a store, and my son evidently watched me trudge across the parking lot. When I climbed in the car, he asked, “Mom, are you ok?”
“Yes, son, I’m fine. Why do you ask?”
“Your face looked kind of stressed.”
“It does? Thanks for telling me; I was just thinking. I feel happy on the inside – my outsides must not match!”
He continued, “My friends tell me that I look stressed when I walk around – even when I don’t feel that way.”
“Huh,” I said. “I guess that’s why I ask you if you’re stressed when I pick you up from school. You walk out looking stressed. You and I must have faces on the outside that don’t always match our true feelings.”
“I asked my friends – should I look like this?” He makes an exaggerated happy face that could not possibly be considered an upgrade in facial expressions. I laughed. He’s a funny guy.
“Maybe we should think about why people see us differently than we see ourselves.”
“I guess.” He’s finished with this conversation. But I haven’t. I realize that I learned a valuable lesson today thanks to my boy. These kinds of lessons and more await us as we enter into the fourth step process.

Thought for today: Some of our persistent hurts, habits and hang-ups are annoyingly resistant to removal because we don’t see ourselves accurately. No wonder we end up confused about why others respond to us the way they do! If Michael and I are walking around looking grumpy, who wants to hug a porcupine? We’re walking around wondering why people are avoiding us while people are avoiding us because of the way our faces look while we’re walking around. Make sense? Step four will help us understand this stuff.

Thought for tomorrow:
Let a man examine himself. 1 Corinthians 11:28 NIV

April 1
Teresa McBean