April 14

April 14

Read Romans 12

One of my favorite verses is found in this chapter of Romans. It used to be my most hated verse. Every time I ran across it in my reading, I eyed it with a beady eye of suspicion. How in the world does one offer their body as a living sacrifice? And is that even appropriate?
Having offered my thoughts, feelings, and choices to the altar of people pleasing on many occasions – inappropriately – I asked myself – is this an egomaniacal God I am being called to serve? Does God need me to “worship and serve” Him so that he can feel worthy? If so, how does that make him any different from a mere mortal – some of whom require loyalty and unwavering allegiance in order to feel in control? Is God a control freak?

But even when I was reading scripture through the lens of codependency run amok, I was intrigued as I read on…Be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will…” I can know the will of God? Wow! I want that!

I’m not sure I ever returned to my questions in paragraph two. Because in all this questioning a thought occurred to me: If I can know the will of God, then I assume God will provide a way for me to do the will of God. Doing the will of God has got to be a better proposition than trying to keep all the people I know happy all the time. I decided to rethink my people pleasing ways…

Thought for today: If you’re tired of disappointing people, and you want to find a more peaceful way to live , try this: List the ways you seek the approval of others. Our constant seeking of the approval of others keeps us in a constant state of impression management. Code words: caring more about what others think about me than what is true of me, feeling unworthy, fearing criticism, lacking confidence, fearing failure, ignoring our own needs.

Example: I seek approval when ____ because ____. This affects ____. This activates ____.
Here’s one way I might answer that: I seek approval when I care more about what a person thinks about me than I care about doing the next right thing. I seek approval of others because sometimes immediate gratification of another’s approval feels good. This affects me in a million ways because people can be pretty demanding, and I can’t make everyone happy all the time – it is too exhausting! This activates feelings of guilt and shame – and I feel like I’m losing pieces of myself in my efforts to make all people happy all the time…

Thought for tomorrow: …Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought. Romans 12:3 NiV. It is arrogant to think that I can do for others what only God can do. Seeking approval from other humans is folly. Sometimes they’re going to be right in their disappointments, sometimes wrong. I think I’m better off entrusting myself into the hands of Him who judges justly than counting on other people.

April 14
Teresa McBean