Day 162 - Week 24 - Always Wrong
Scripture focus: Refuse good advice and watch your plans fail; take good counsel and watch them succeed. Proverbs 15:22 The Message
In the early years of our marriage, my husband gently pointed out that I was slow to acknowledge wrongdoing. I particularly love, in hindsight, how he phrased his feedback. Of course he's right. I am slow to acknowledge wrongdoing. It has nothing to do with thinking I'm right - in fact, I walk around most of the time feeling like I've done something wrong. Or I might do something wrong any minute. I have the feeling that I'll never get anything quite right. If my husband had chided me with a comment about thinking I'm always right, I'd have told the man he was crazy! (And confirmed his belief.) But God gave my husband better, more honest words - acknowledging wrongdoing is my problem. Feeling wrong I've got down cold.
"All my life, I've felt as though I have to work twice as hard to be half as good as other people. But no matter how hard I try, I just never feel like I measure up or belong. Does that make any sense?" Shame is a strong sense of being uniquely and hopelessly different and less than other human beings. Shame symptoms include beliefs, emotions and behaviors that display the underlying pain that comes from seeing ourselves as eternally separated from others. (Released from Shame, p. 25)
In Wilson's book Released From Shame, she provides several explanations for shame-based living. In my experience, almost everyone I know struggles with some degree of shame. Our feelings of terminal uniqueness aren't all that unique!
I have a couple of friends who are the exception. The shame gene skipped right over them. They are able to acknowledge both right and wrong doing. And when they mess up - they don't act like the world is coming to an end. They simply self-correct. They make amends if necessary. My friends amaze me.
In tomorrow's devotional, we're going to explain shame some more. But for today, my prayer is that God continue to surround you with good advice, wise counsel, and the wisdom to recognize the gift of good friends with wise words.
Recommended reading: 1 Kings 5 and 6 in the morning; Acts 7 and Psalm 126 in the evening
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