September 20
Scripture focus: But my righteous one will live by faith. And if he shrinks back, I will not be pleased with him." But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who believe and are saved. Hebrews 10:38-39 (The Message)
What would it mean for my friend to have chosen to live by faith? She believes that is exactly what she is practicing -- her faith. She goes to church (a new one since her shinanagins caused all sorts of broken relationships at the old church), sings in the praise band, teaches a youth bible study, keeps the nursery. Isn't that living by faith? Some might suggest that perhaps that is more about living at church than living by faith -- but I digress!
What if...living by faith meant that when she started having feelings for her friend's husband, she ran (not walked, not meandered, not sauntered) to her most trusted advisors and told them the truth about her situation?
What if...her trusted advisors were actually trustworthy, and they suggested that she take some proactive measures to nip this fantasy in the bud before something terrible happened?
What if...she actually listened? Maybe she would have to seek out some good counseling. Perhaps she'd have to end the "couples" activities, and only hang out with her girlfriend. She might have to tell her husband of the temptation, and ask his help and support in figuring out why she is thinking about another man rather than him. Maybe she needs to stop drinking margaritas on Friday night when the two couples go out to dinner. These kinds of choices are going to require trust in God and not her own desires. She's going to have to choose to remind herself that God loves her even when her marriage is shaky. She'll need a crash refresher course on how God meets her every need, so that she doesn't fall into a self-pity pot and start trying to find her happy place independent of God and his parameters for loving him, others and self.
Faith isn't about having great feelings about God and his ways all the time. Some days it's about taking the next right step -- especially when the "committee of voices" in our head is screaming for us to take matters into our own hand and go for that which is pleasurable rather than that which is pleasing.
You see, pleasing God isn't a condition of relationship with him. But when we trust him, we desire to please him because that's what we want when we love someone and feel secure in their love for us. My friend clearly knew that what she was doing was not pleasing to God. This did not stop her.
What may help her in the future is realizing that before she actually committed a single "bad act" -- she had cheated on God in her thought life. She stopped trusting God and began relying on someone or something else to make her happy. I suspect we would all be better at boundaries if we constantly reminded ourselves to start with trusting God.
Recommended reading: Nehemiah 7 - 10
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1 comment:
WOW! Teresa was you in my head this morning. For the past 2 weeks I have let what my husband did or didn’t d effect what I did or didn’t do and was acting like a 2 year old. I allowed him to turn me in to something I hate because I wanted to feel his love so much. Then more I push to get our marriage to work the more I pushed him out of my life. Last night I blamed him for me not being able to sleep since he choose to sleep in my sons bed instead of ours. So since he didn’t sleep with me I wasn’t going to drive him to work. (yes I know childish) Well after trying to talk to him (well neg him till I got the answers I wanted) half the way to work I finally gave up and started to pray. That is when God reminded me that HE loved me and that he was my ROCK. That the love I have so seeking and even demanding from my husband (that I’m so not getting because he isn’t capable of giving) I ALREADY HAVE FROM GOD!!!
I need to not let what other s do effect what I do. Right now is not the time to let my husband all the things he does that hurts me it is time I tell God all that and let him take away my pain since he is the only one that can do it. Let God be the one to give me the love that I am seeking for and trust him will all my problems and let him help me through them because I know I can’t do it without him.
I feel it I let God be the one to love me the way I need to be loved (I will never be let down) and then allow my husband to love the way he can with no expectations we all will be much happier.
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